ONE LINERS 

1. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

2. Change is inevitable. Except from a vending machine.

3. Back up my hard drive? How do I put it in reverse?

4. I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

5. I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

6. She's always late. Her ancestors arrived on the June Flower. 

7. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you.

8. Despite the cost of living, it remains very popular. 

9. Nothing is fool-proof to a sufficiently talented fool. 

10. Diplomacy is saying "nice doggy" until you find a rock. 

11. A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

12. On the other hand, you have different fingers.