CHRONIC ILLNESS HUMOR

You know you have a chronic illness when…

• You understand all the medical terminology discussed on the T.V. show Grey's Anatomy.
• When you hear the term "Club Med" you automatically think of the hospital.
• You ask your child to open the "child-proof" bottles of medicine because your hands are too sore.
• Your medical records have to be transported on a cart.
• To entertain people at parties you recite the side effects of medications as if you are the voice over on a commercial.
• Your favorite Oprah program is when Dr. Oz is on.
• To get rid of boredom on road trips, your whole family can go through the alphabet and name a drug that starts with each letter of the alphabet.
• When you're unable to sleep because of pain, you watch "The Jerry Springer Show" and feel like you actually have a life.
• Your spelling has improved dramatically, especially on words like "fibromyalgia" and "osteoporosis."
• Or you've been "Around the World in Thirty Minutes" with CNN's Headline News 57 times in one sitting.
• You have a panic attack in public and say, "Praise God this is only the fourth one today!"
• You're invited to the wedding of the gal who works at the hospital lab.
• You're child thinks watching you do injections of medication is "cool."
• You have a flashback and don't know what happened and can honestly say, "I don't know where I was or what I was doing but I'll make something up if you'd like."

Reprinted with permission of Lisa Copen, Copyright 2007,

National Invisible Chronic Illness Awareness Week, http://www.invisibleillness.com